Autumn please come back

I feel like my whole face is melting off. I don't think I've been this hot in a very very long time. Yesterday I just sat around and watched movies with Kris's parents because not moving at all was the best cure I could think of in trying to cool myself off. Their air conditioner is broken and apparently no one works on the weekends in this city. I'm moody and I just want to sit in a bath of ice, while sucking on an Otter Pop!

Major/Minor

I'm washing the sheets. Few things compare to some fresh sheets on the bed. I'm going to do some additional laundry, clean up the room, open the windows and let in some fresh air. Yes, that sounds very nice indeed.

Perhaps an afternoon jog will be in order as well. I've been taking a much needed break, but I'm starting to feel like a lazy bum. I've never just sat around and relaxed as much as I have these last few weeks. Eat, sleep, and shower. Those are the activities of a champion. At least for one who needed a major vacation.

I'm looking forward to getting in touch with some old friends. I miss them so and a part of me wants to feel what I used to feel in the past.

I'm trying to decided when I want to graduate. I can do it in December, but staying another semester might yield some additional opportunities. I don't want to cheat myself of anything, but at the same time I really want to be done with school. I have friends who are younger than me graduating before me. I guess essentially it's not a race. This is my life. I need to choose what's best for me and my future.

Something that annoys me. When people talk badly about others and then act nice to them. I've never found out how that works. Wouldn't that be exhausting? It's exhausting for me to witness. I'd rather have no friends, then have a trillion friends who I secretly break down. Deceptive. I'd rather people know my feelings towards them. I'm not going to be
a bit*h about it, but at least I can feel like I'm being honest. I have the unfortunate presence of knowledge and assertiveness in my life. Ignorance is bliss and ignorance is something that probably won't be a primary attribute in my life. I'm lucky aren't I? It complicates things. I think I need to start somethings over. Something is out of key. Perhaps an investigation is in order.

One brain needed ASAP. Contact Maggie with any inquiries.

And yet here I am again. Trying to figure everything out. It seems impossible and I feel like throwing up. These are the times when you just feel stiff. Not sure really what to say, even though you know something needs to be said. I just want my brain to work right now. I need it to work so it can make sense of everything that is running through my mind.

A start.

One lesson I learned today-I need to keep my mouth shut all of the time. I really hate the drama that comes with opening ones mouth and today I'm making it a goal to not say anything bad about anyone or any situation again, unless it's straight to the person or the situation. This way I won't have to add any unnecessary drama into my life with the "he said/ she said" crap.


I hate drama, I hate everything about it and this is going to be my way to not contribute to it. It's going to be hard, but I think it will be worth it. So don't anyone be offended when you're telling me about an annoyance or bad habit of someone or something and I don't have a response. I'll listen but don't expect me to contribute or agree or try and make anyone feel justified. I'm keeping my thoughts to myself.


I feel like I have so much to say, but perhaps it's not worth it.

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I got a childhood book at the bookstore a couple of days ago. I loved this book when I was younger. I was such a reader in those days and there are a couple of books that have really stuck with me. This is one of them. Phantom Tollbooth. Read it if you haven't already. It's lovely. I'm in Carson now with Kris, and I had to get some books to keep me company while he is as he says, "bringing home the bacon for our kingdom." :) I think this book should do for now. I'll read it fast, but it will be a great comfort to me.


He takes care of me. I love that. It's very comforting. I've seen a lot of growth from him. It's really a great thing. We both have some improvements to be made, but I think that we're both growing, and together too, which is a really amazing feeling.


We're going to San Francisco tomorrow to go see a show. Kris is going to show me around. I'm excited, I've never been. I love taking trips with him. I'm excited to go to a new city. I love to travel. I wish I did it more. I wonder if I should bring the new pillow cases Kris got me for my birthday. They make me happy. Since we are the King and the Queen, it fits quite well. I need to get them washed before we leave if I want to take them. hmm.



I think karma is a great thing. I can currently think of a couple of situations that warrant a smile. It sounds kind of bad, but I'm quite enjoying what I know.


I miss my old friends.


I wish I knew what to do in difficult situations. I wish I had all the answers, but I guess I wouldn't learn much, now would I?